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| St. Jerome Reading in the Countryside by Giovanni Bellini |
I'm probably due for an update here. I've been going through a lot of stuff lately as you might have gathered from the vacation settings I placed on the Farthington email account.
I was running on empty somewhat with the project. I really feed off you guys ("the image of the cannibal"?) and wasn't getting a lot of interplay for a long while there. Then, my spirit got kind of broken by all this Planned Parenthood stuff. I haven't fully discerned the spirits that are at work there, but it's having a big effect on me. I'm reading a chapter from the book Saintly Solutions on anger. I guess the good news is that I am in good company; the bad news is that my anger is probably the front runner in the quest to utterly destroy me. The sheer horror of it all has sent me fleeing back to the Church after a good amount of time spent kicking aimlessly around town. I need to see nuns and hosts and crucifixes and children and anything else to exorcise these demons, to remind me that God wins.
I'm sorry for the message. It was my immature way of despairing of the project entirely. I still am living with some of that confusion. I'm at a Manley Hopkins-type moment of wanting to throw all my pre-conversion writing in the burn barrel.
In the midst of all this, Max reached out to me as soon as he got home from New Orleans wanting to work on the project as soon as and as much as possible. That enthusiasm was contagious and we worked together a couple nights ago, going through the Joe Lazarus material together. It is an interesting selection of songs, not exactly palatable to a wide audience. I think all of those songs, with the exception of "Hey Rome," need transposing and/or arranging. So Max and I are going to do some work on those and see if they come out playable/listenable.
I could use your perspective on things at this point, your thinking on the direction of the project as a whole and your role in it. I'm full of doubts about everything.
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