ALL ONE! ALL ONE! ALL ONE!

The following is an excerpt of a 21 May 2015 email exchange between Liza and Art (and the group).



Liza:

No shame. Those labels make for the best reading material in the shower and beyond. But you're right. TO UNITE MANKIND! ETERNAL FATHER ETERNALLY ONE! 

Farthington should market a product and write his own radical moral ABCs on the label. (Someone else's.) 

He'd either be selling us, 

A. Nothing. There would be no product. Only the labels and advertisements promising a really good product. Since masterfully created advertisements can make consumers buy anything, there'd be lines out the door to buy Farthington's "product." 

B. Some sort of "rejuvenating!" kombucha-like drink that's been brewed with either cave-dwelling bat guano or "repurposed" garbage. "Made with 100% authentic garbage from real life homes in Detroit!" Similar to scenario A, consumers would be lining up for blocks to buy Farthington's $23 bottles of actual feces / trash. I imagine these labels more like Kool-Aid's than Dr. Bronner's. In place of the Kool-Aid mascot's goofy grin staring back at us would be Farthington's demented Sea Devil, of course.

C. Choose your own adventure!

Art:

I love it! 

We could just print the entire text (or excerpts) of The Principles of Theory: A Systematic Approach to Ideas on the label! Slap "Made in Detroit" on it and every single person and their mother will buy it! 

I don't think we should try selling feces or even kombucha. That said, if there were a huge public health crisis and scandal, we might be able to capitalize on that notoriety like Sean Parker rose from the ashes of Napster to become a multi-billionaire. So I guess I'm open to feces. 

Really, we could make something like soap or something that people won't get sick on and sue us for. We'd need there to be a huge profit margin to make it worth it, so I think Detroit-area trash is getting very close... 

Who knows, maybe someone would buy Detroit trash. When you think about it, it's three birds with one stone: (1) you get some Detroit trash, adding to your own cache of vicarious street cred/status, (2) you help clean up Detroit by transporting Detroit trash from the streets of Detroit to your home, and (3) you get the immortal words of Carlton Farthington on an easy-to-read, appealing container--a collector's item in and of itself! 

I think we need to do a Kickstarter for this. Would you be able to design a prototype? We might need to start changing the Sea Devil image as it is probably proprietary. 

I guess we could tread that Deadmau5 line a little, just barely accentuating some of the dimensions.